Not feeling well tonight. Not feeling well this week. I had the thought, thinking of my cat and how quickly she passed away, sick one day then gone, how my own life might also be accounted for, this moment, this night, this weekend. I nearly slipped and fell in the shower this afternoon, and before that I witnessed a reckless driver nearly cause an accident by swerving in front of another car while going through an intersection.
And I wondered: What if God granted me a request before I died, and I thought of my family. I do not think any of my family are in any specific danger of hellfire. I have good hope to think they all seek God and his righteousness whether or not we all agree on doctrine, but they were my immediate prayer, for their souls and eternal happiness.
Then I thought, I better ask for my own. So, I prayed for Heaven, to be with my God. The pain of whatever cold has gripped me has gripped me, and all my thoughts are blurred with dreams now though I haven’t even touched the medicine which promises to make me sleep.
A sentiment arose in me, wordless and unbidden, but it was a prayer nonetheless. I try to write it down:
Make me like your Son, my Father, a way to Heaven. O my God, must I also reach down into Hell? Please help me, for I am afraid to do what is right. Help me to embrace your Love.
Tale Told 